Written For: Street Articles
The danger signs in relationships are sometimes not noticeable especially when a person is deeply involved – and in love. While being with someone makes lives more colorful and can make us believe that all things are possible when we are in love, it is best to keep our eyes open because when we least expect it, there are factors that can dampen an otherwise healthy relationship.
The Twins of Doom – some monsters are real, while some are but a figment of hyperactive imaginations. In a relationship, however, there are two specific behemoths that could put a wedge between you and your beloved. One is called the ‘green eyed monster’ otherwise known as jealousy, and the other is possessiveness. Both are equally malevolent. Jealously would lash out on everything it considers a threat (i.e. close friend of the opposite sex, colleague, or even your success), whilst possessiveness will transform someone into a control freak.
Transmission: Lost – communication is vital. It is one of the foundations of a strong relationship. But when you stop to communicate, then something must be really wrong, and it’s not because of the transmitters. So, you’ve been busy with work and your boss or colleague is stressing you out and you can no longer endure another ‘stressor’ (i.e. your partner and his/her equally stressful day). So what do you do? You turn off the mechanism. You can see your partner’s mouth twitching and yapping, but do you don’t exactly hear what he/she is saying, nothing gets through, communication has been barred.
Lack of R-E-S-P-E-C-T – Basically, one partner downgrades or underestimates the other. A woman may question the ability of her man to be successful in his work or endeavors. Comments like, “you sure you can do that?,” or “I don’t think you can handle it” is one way of blowing respect. Another example would be a man saying, “that’s stupid,” “you’re idea sucks,” or “shut up” after his girlfriend, fiancé or wife offered a suggestion.
Danger Signs in Relationships
Your Partner Constantly Checks On You. Jealousy and possessiveness are the makings of a ticking time bomb that could annihilate any relationship into oblivion. Both are all master sneaks that would whisper psychotic imaginative ideations. With both their urgings, your beloved would eventually do some random checks on you, which includes phone calls ‘coyly’ asking what you are doing, who you are with, and where you’ve been.
Your Partner Never Listens. For a relationship to work, both parties need to communicate. How else would you be able to understand each other if you keep tuning out your partner?
Now some of you may say, “My partner wouldn’t understand. So there’s no point in telling.” If you’re partner is willing to listen he/she will understand no matter how mundane or important the issue is. Communication in a relationship goes beyond understanding.
Your Partner Only Has Harsh Words For You. Just like communication, respect is also one of the basic foundations of a strong and long-lasting relationship. Respect means that you value that person greatly.
So, what exactly happens when a relationship lacks respect?
Once you undermine your partner, you are ultimately saying that they are not important. Degrading your partner doesn’t help with their self-esteem and your relationship, either. Why? Because a person being undermined or downgraded would take-on another persona just to protect himself or herself, whilst pleasing you. A woman or man being saddled or silenced is not a pretty picture. Ultimately, the person being undermined would feel burdened, unhappy and would loss one’s self-assurance – and would surely try to escape a relationship that does them wrong rather than good.
Danger signs in relationships can be subtle or glaring, and we should all learn to see them for what they are.